As I travel down life’s highway people keep swerving into my lane. They cut me off, yell at me and give me middle-finger salutes. I’d say they’re outright anti-social and mean spirited.
Just the other day I went to a donut shop and ordered a small coffee with a chocolate donut. When my order came it was a chocolate latte and a plain donut. When I tried to explain the mixup to the teenage cashier with a snake tattoo on her neck, she changed from a smiling server to a confrontational moose.
Last week I happened to stop in a sandwich shop for lunch. My order came to $8.53. I gave the young lad $9.03. He gave me a strange look. “Are you messing with me?” he asked.
I assured him I had no intention of messing with him, but was actually trying to make things easier for him. After a few minutes of trying to figure it out, he called his supervisor for help. The manager handed me two quarters and apologized. He explained that the cashier was only a junior in high school.
A while back my New Balance running shoes started smelling like feet, so my wife encouraged me to go for replacements. I argued that they were in very good shape. Kathy countered by telling me the shoes wouldn’t be allowed in the house any more.
The shoe salesclerk was a beautiful young lady and was overly friendly. She looked down at my shoes with a beautiful smile and asked what size I wore. I told her I had worn an 11 1/2 for many years. She insisted measuring me anyway.
After measuring both feet she looked at me wide-eyed and said “Your feet are very unusual…one is an 11 1/2 and the other is a 13. When you run, do you normally run in circles?”
We had a good laugh and she brought out an a well-worn box. I put the shoes on and they felt fine, so I bought them.
When I got home and told Kathy that my feet were different sizes, she started laughing and asked who had convinced me of that. I described my beautiful saleslady and she rolled her eyes back and laughed harder.
There are a lot of forks in life’s highway folks. My advice is that when you approach one… go straight.
